Love triumphs, as we always knew it would

Today marks the end of Prop 8 and it's about damn time.
As I will be celebrating this victory for my GLBT friends
I also focus on one intention...

As we are hurdling through these vibrant times into what is coming next at greater and greater velocities, the fearful are bound to become more fearful until they finally breakdown and ultimately breakthrough. No matter what judgments are created and powers of influence wielded, the walls of fear will eventually crumble before Love. When the walls come tumbling down, avoiding the pitfalls that only perpetuate what we yearn to leave behind becomes more crucial and hugging everyone on the steps of the courthouse is the only real answer. Love is all there is and it's triumph is a victory for consciousness in general, even for those that don't realize it.
So as I smile and celebrate this evening I'll also be holding space in my heart for all the people devastated by today's news, because they're the ones that need the most help, the most acceptance and the most Love. If we're gonna change this world at the rate it's ready to change it's gonna take everybody.

Only Love,
p

A convo with the spirit in the sky

As some of you may know, I had my birthday this past Sunday.
Leading up to it came those old familiar thoughts about whether i was "where i should be", whether or not i was "successful". I allowed them to pass like clouds yet elements of them lingered still.
My mother always says the best thing for emotion is motion and following this advice I have been on the move so to speak a great deal lately.

This dance of alternating meditation and outright exertion came to a close on Saturday. Greeting the last sunset and the first full moon of a new chapter in my life within the magical mountains of Malibu, I was received with so much love by people I hardly knew... from this life anyway.

My time there began with a dance party on a bus at dusk and closed with a sunrise vigil in the company of three powerful women breathing in the warm light of morning, it was an honor to know stillness in their company.

One of these angels specifically said something that keeps coming back to me, something i'd like to share with you all.

"success is just when reality catches up to your imagination"

On our walk back to camp, while eating fresh picked kumquats, occasionally stopping to pet the horses around the property this thought expanded a million fold. Imagining so much for us all, the possibilities are literally infinite.

I remembered how only a week earlier i'd imagined spending my birthday with a campfire, music, beautiful souls in a community setting and healing convo's and interactions abound. I had no clue how that would happen but the conjured energy felt amazing when i thought about it and so i let it.

Success is just when reality catches up to our imagination, it feels good to be successful and it's about damn time. :)

Imagining Love,
p

Grateful to Love!

Birthdays like holidays can be loaded with emotion at times.
To share a little of what that statement means to me...
my childhood best friend since Montessori school was an amazing light of being that went by the name of Andy Morgan, that's him up top.

Whether it was building forts in the woods and telling our parents we were moving out into our new dwelling to become monks or pestering my dad to buy us a zima after working all day in texas heat cleaning up a former hell's angel abode, all of my memories with Andy are treasured.
Growing up we spent most of our birthdays together, as they fell on the same day, and we always found a way to get into just enough trouble to be entertaining but not enough to get arrested.
My earliest communions with music were in his inspiring and passionate presence as well as the first conversations i can remember speculating about the nature of the universe.

In high school he got an early 70's hunter green cadillac as his first car and we would drive to lakes and local swimming holes listening to James Brown and laughing our asses off. The tune that often served as our soundtrack was the "the payback", a gem of a track that we'd blare into the streets singing, "i don't know karate but i know crazy" with smiles as wide as those caddy doors.

After high school Andy left Austin first and continued to inspire me with how he lived so courageously, like each day could be his last. Riding his bike from Washington state back to Texas one summer, backpacking through Europe, Patagonia and Tibet and eventually moving to NYC, he was always moving, laughing and loving.

After a visit to NYC in mid May of '05, he called me and said how much he loved hanging out and that he wanted me to make one promise, that i'd never stop dancing and freestyling. I said "of course brother" and thanked him for being in my life. He was hit on his bike on June 26 2005 at the corner of Houston and Elizabeth and left his body later that day.
I'm so grateful to of had that last conversation and I'm so grateful I had the opportunity to love him as I did and as I still do.

Tonight a friend took me to dinner and when my mind wandered to Andy, as it's his birthday too, James Brown sang us a little song that i want to share with you.

James Brown - The Payback


Grateful to Love this much,
p

The 5th of july

The day after a holiday is always an interesting time, you know?
As if just beyond the festivities and revelry lies what that holiday actually celebrates,
in the wild so to speak, uncaged by a calendar day.
In the case of this Independence day, i broke up a fight while people within ear shot were chanting freedom as a huge amount of oil continued to spew into the gulf of Mexico. Admittedly I see lots of changes needed and I have no doubt we can make these changes.

So what's the first step?

How about calling your local congressman and telling them you want clean, green renewable energy as the backbone of this country NOW!!!

You can find whom that may be here:


http://www.senate.gov/index.htm

http://www.house.gov/

Waking up to the impact of inaction

It's certainly been sometime since I've put my thoughts into this little box to stare back at me and ask "what else?"
What else can I do?
What else can I allow?

Admittedly, my life is an animated blessing...
I'm surrounded by courageouly loving community that inspire me through their heroic actions, deep sharing and powerful silences.
I spend most of my days playing music, communing with the ocean and enjoying the marvels of convenience in this pop cultural mecca by the sea.
When I was a child, about 6 or so, I remember my Aunt and cousins dropped by the house on their way to the beach. In a rush of eagerness and excitement, I jumped into the car and 7 hours later found myself at

Today I faced again the realization that along with BP, I am accountable for the atrocity that is still occurring in the gulf.
This was followed by a brief internalized assault upon myself
for not doing more in my everyday life to create a world
where BP stood for BE PLAYFUL instead of BRITISH PETROLEUM.
Then, in acknowledging that there was no power in self deprecation
I released the whip of the punisher and with an open hand remembered...

In accepting that I too have played a role in this whole mess,
I gain access to being a part of it's solution.

and so with nothing before me but space I ask myself,

"What else can I do?
What else can I allow?"

Being open to the greatest answers only requires trust,

p

6 songs in 7 days....

this sxsw has been a crazy adventure.

when the festival wound down on tuesday the 23rd
i decided to start writing some new songs.
who knows, maybe i'll be playing a few of them next year
when i'm on the artist side of the festival.
inspired by my friend and fellow songwriter/performer jessie payo whom is nothing short of totally awesome, i took on writing a song a day for a week

though i only ended up with six, cause today i'm practicing for my show
the tunes all have a life of their own and i look forward to sharing them with you

in case you're wondering the songs titles are

blueberries
brother i had known
leave on the lights
springkiss
deep within our truth
april full moon

i look forward to sharing them with you all

love, p

SXSW...

It's that time of year again in Austin where every venue in town has been overflowing with the population of a worldwide musical community. This year was the 4th year I've worked the festival in some shape or form and it was a wonderful opportunity to practice mindfulness of thought as I sorted, allocated and delivered DJ back line to electronic artist at the festival.

As my ego kept voicing feeling's of being left out and internalizing thoughts like,
"your missing the boat!" and "why aren't you playing a show instead of making spreadsheets?!"
I had many chances to observe my fears and frustrations under pressure.

When someone would appear at the 11th hour saying they needed something that involoved a mad scramble on my part to obtain...
I'd thank them for the opportunity to be loving under the gun, take a deep breath and then do the best I could to take care of them with all that I had available.
One of the things that helped me the most was frequently
standing in front of a mirror,
smiling at myself lovingly,
looking into my eyes as I would a lover, and saying,
"You're amazing and I love you"
(often this involved going to the men's room which was anything but empty and supplied more incentive to smile and laugh at myself for ever taking life seriously in the first place)

So after a long week of playing the role of "Parker, The DJ Gear Guy"
I'm reminded again how very grateful I am for all the people and their effort that goes into making a festival, or any show for that matter, happen as smoothly as possible.
I also got to spend time with some really wonderful people whom I'm grateful to know as well.

Next year I will be playing though... :)

Blessings and LOVE!
p

"With every breath you get the chance to start all over again..."

a passing yogi said this to me as we walked away from our morning yoga practice on a sunny winter day. it was one of those moments where i immediately felt that the universe had spoken to me directly through the voice of another.

months later, those words still echoed into the darkest corners of my life,
inspiring me to consiously stoke the fires of my own recreation with love, gratitude and patience.

one yoga intensive later, which i highly recommend to anyone that feels called to one,
i find it's more and more of a habit to repeat those words silently with every breath i take. for me, having a practice wherein i acknowledge my true self daily has been the best gift i could have ever given myself.

so, in my choice to further live my reconstruction
to feel it, see it and taste it...

i bought a beat up old sailboat
completely cleaned it out... i mean everything... it needed to go.
then choosing what i wished for it to contain,
i cared for it and built it into what i want.
many a moment i was frustrated, sad or lonely
but by choice i continued the process of recreation.
not by trying to do more, but by breathing another beginning into each dead end.

it is truly a blessing to remember that we wield the power to create who we are.
that whenever we don't like how things are going it's up to us to create anew.
and that this ongoing process is less of an action and more of an allowance...
just like breathing.

Blessed be,
p